What Are You Doing Here?

“What are You Doing Here?”
Rev. Karla Miller Eliot Church of Newton, UCC
August 7, 2011 OT20A I Kings 19:9-14

I do not own a GPS. I do have an app on my Iphone that can give me step by step directions when I am driving, but it is difficult to follow while driving, since there is no voice, and it is dangerous, I realize, to glance at it while driving. It doesn’t matter, though, because most of the time it seems that there are always road closures, non-existent roads, roads with no signs, roads that have multiple names--and the GPS counts on little details like road signs to make its directions driveable. Obviously, the developers of this little devices did not take the villages and towns of Boston into consideration.
Truth be told, I am someone who often gets lost--in spite of having a map or GPS step by step directions.
Even though I think I am following directions when I am traveling to a new destination, I inevitably make a wrong turn or miss a road, and I usually end up saying to myself,
“What am I doing HERE?”

This happens in my journey in life, too.
Whether the result of decisions or unconscious actions,
with the best of intentions,
or emotional choices,
More often than I like to admit,
I think to myself,
“What am I doing HERE?”

I like to think this was the question that Elijah was wondering about when he found himself backed into a cave, hoping his skin was safe. How did he end up THERE? Just a short time ago, he had been serving as God’s prophet to King Ahab and Queen Jezebel. They were pretty involved in Baal worship, and the people of Israel had been following along. Elijah’s call was to bring back the people, and their leaders to the God of Israel. And so, Elijah challenges the prophets of Baal to a contest, that would prove whose God was indeed more powerful. And so, two altars were built, and a sacrifice on each altar. The prophets of Baal prayed all day long, and yet the sacrifice was not ignited by their prayers. After ridiculing the prophets, Elijah ordered four giant jars of water be poured upon the altar for God. Then Elijah prayed, asking God to accept the sacrifice, upon which great fires from the sky rain down to ignite the sacrifice, signifying that God was pleased with the sacrifice. God had won, and Elijah seized the moment and ordered all the prophets of Baal to be killed. Which, of course, was the logical thing to do as an Old Testament prophet of God. However, instead of winning Ahab and Jezebel over by his actions and display of God’s power, Elijah has deeply offended (Enraged) Jezebel, who has ordered his death. A hunted man, Elijah flees to the desert, and finds himself in a god-forsaken place.

What happened? Wasn’t he doing what he was supposed to do? Didn’t he follow the plan? How could have he ended up where he was, alone, terrified, not knowing where to turn or go next? What was he doing here?

And so imagine,
Being asked that very question by the One whom you are serving.
In a dream, God asks Elijah, “What are you doing here?”
If I had been Elijah in that dream, I would have said to the Lord,
“Well, God, why don’t you tell me WHAT THE HECK I AM DOING HERE!!!!”
In reality, Elijah evades God’s question, by defending his zealousness for God, complaining that the people Israel abandoned the covenant, implying that God’s work over the centuries has unraveled, and his own work has been fruitless--in spite of following the plan.

After listening to Elijah’s defense, God gives Elijah a strange directive--to go outside of the cave, and expose himself, for God will pass by. In ancient Israel, if you remember, to be in the presence of God meant death. Death by the presence of God, or by the soldiers of Jezebel are Elijah’s only options. He chooses the former.

And indeed, the presence of God does pass by,
not in a mighty wind, or in a roaring fire,
but in sheer sweet silence.

And in that sweet silence,
a Voice asks Elijah again,
“What are you doing here?”

And in spite of surviving being in the presence of the Living God, in spite of being blessed with a God-experience, in spite of hearing the voice of the Holy, Elijah remains unchanged. His response to God was the same as it was before his God-encounter.

Most biblical characters who have a God Encounter, are changed. Moses--after the burning bush, follows God’s call to Egypt, to liberate the children of Israel. Hagar, Abraham’s slave woman banished to the wilderness to die with her son, experiences the presence of God, and names God, “The One Who Sees”, and her desperation is lifted, and their lives are saved. After experiencing the presence of God, Elijah is invited to wrestle with God’s question, and yet, he doesn’t. He was not transformed. To me, this is astounding. Elijah can only defend, stick to his roadmap, in spite of not ending up where he thought he would be. He chooses not to change, he chooses not to be transformed, and he is stuck.

What are you doing here?
This question invites self-reflection, wonder, an opportunity to turn within, to take a moment to re-calibrate if necessary.

Indeed, where are you? What ARE you doing here, in this very time, this present moment?
How did you get where you are?
Are you lost,
are you on track?
Have you made any wrong turns? Did you learn from them? Grow from them?
How are you open to transformation?
How do you live in the moment,
but remain conscious of being connected with the divine and all of creation?
Where is the sweet silent presence of God in your life?

We journey through the depth and thickness of our daily living,
with so many demands, and responsibilities, and decisions...
we follow directions,
we use our maps, and sometimes end up where we thought we would be,
and sometimes we end up in entirely different places that we never thought we would be--
whether it be career wise, relationship wise, or otherwise.
But sometimes,
sometimes,
we need to just stop--
before we get backed into a cave,
and simply listen for the Voice in the silence,
asking us, “What are you doing here? How did you get here?”.
We are invited to discern, to reflect, and to wonder, Is this where I need to be? How is it that I am being called, as God’s servant in this world? How is it that I am being called as God’s disciple?”

What are YOU doing here?

May the silence of God visit you,
and give you the space and sweetness you need,

to listen and reflect upon the questions of God.
Amen.